Reflections

There are all sort of calendars and birthdays. For instance, I celebrate 3 birthdays. On May 19th, I celebrate my actual birth into existence. November 18th is my Masonic birthday. The day of which I was raised to the Master Mason level of Free Masonry. And lastly, October 23rd…my 2nd birthday since receiving stem cells in 2008. As this date is rapidly approaching, I feel it is time to reflect on my past year’s events and progress as well as setbacks.

Thankfully, I no longer wear a surgical mask or gloves when leaving the house. I can freely attend parties, visit the mall, movies, restaurants and even travel on public transportation, subways, buses, boats, and airplanes. My oncologists still advise me to visit and travel these places during lower traffic hours, as my immune system will always be compromised. That is where good ole’ fashioned common sense comes into play.

I was able to participate in Gabriel’s Halloween parade and his 3rd birthday party. I went on field trips with this school. I read his class books and attended Father’s day and other school events. We met Santa Claus together and went on 2 duck tours. I watched him learn how to write his name, order for himself at a restaurant, become potty trained, built Lego towers taller than me, and just enjoy being a kid, playful and free.

I got on a plane for the first time in 2 years and traveled to St. Louis to visit my brother, Beau, and his family. He allowed me to get drunk, no matter how obnoxious I became. He introduced me to his Methodist church and took me to an awesome Mongolian grill and kick-butt Super Bowl party.

Proudly, I was raised to the 3rd degree of Free Masonry by my father. It was an honor for him to do so and now I sit beside him in the East of our lodge as Master and Chaplain. The Free Masons are an unbelievable group. Sad to think, that if I had never gotten sick, I would not have had the time nor inclination to get involved. Some things do happen for a reason and I am thankful for this one.

I have attempted to be here for my parents as they are ill as well. I know they take allot of verbal abuse from me and I need to find a better outlet for my ongoing frustrations. They both do so much to help me on a daily basis from dealing with Gabe, feeding me, and not to mention giving me a place to sleep. Perhaps my newest endeavour into the world of Reiki will calm my nerves, so I may focus my energy on positive thoughts and stop taking life out on the one‘s I love.

Lastly, my health is what it is. Blood work is stable for the first time in 2 years. My overall cholesterol is the best it has been in a decade. I have a left knee that will undoubtedly need to replaced at some point in the near future. My back compensates for the balky knee causing daily pain. However, given these physical setbacks, I am mentally strong and ready to take on the world.

On November 4th, there is a hearing date in front a judge for my divorce. Gabe will always be my son but his mother and I can finally move on with our individual lives. My life…what will I do with the time I am now given?

As I mentioned, I am beginning Reiki 1. I am compiling my journal and blog entries into an eventual book. I continue to create and try new recipes for another eventual cook book (possibly co-written with my mother). I aspire to be a better father, son, brother, co-worker, friend, and person. Nothing in life is set in stone, but if you are waiting for a hand out…you might as well just step out of line.

I wish all my family and friends a happy fall season. This is the best time of the year. Best foods, cool weather, outdoor fire pits, changing of the trees, good times and good friends.

~Cheers