Allow me to indulge myself and then proceed to another topic. As my 2nd birthday passed by, I can’t help but see how far I’ve come and yet how far I still need to go. Some conditions get better. Some stay the same. Some get worse. Some are just starting.
The lymphoma is in complete remission. My blood work looks stable aside from some heightened kidney functions and low platelets. Although, my legs are strengthening the knee joint itself continues to weaken and get worse. It will require a total knee replacement at some point in time. Lastly, the IV port (placed on May 14, 2008) is finally failing and needs to be replaced. This will require a minor surgery to remove and insert a new port. For the average patient, a ½ inch incision is a 2-3 week healing process. For me, it is a 2-3 month healing process, with a high risk of infection.
In better news, Wednesday Nov 3rd I will take my Reiki 1 attunement. I’ve been receiving Reiki healing for several months and am now ready to start practicing myself. November will be busy. Besides Thanksgiving being my favorite holiday, my divorce hearing is finally scheduled for Nov 19th and my baby boy’s 4th birthday is Nov 21st. Things happen in threes. These will be three events to celebrate. Thanksgiving is just a great bonus!
Yesterday, hospice was called in to attend to my uncle. Uncle Harvey (my father’s only brother) has been fighting renal cancer for close to 2 years now. Unfortunately, it looks like the fight is coming to an end. There is nothing I can do to stop the inevitable and after seeing him a few months back, I can’t bring myself to see him again under these conditions.
Some may call me a coward or weak. I understand the need to be surrounded my loved ones in a time of need but it hits too close to home for me to be with him now. It sounds horrible but I’ve made my peace. I can’t witness him now, without visioning myself in his place. My father understands my feelings and I hope the rest of my family does as well.
When my uncle moves on, it will not be easy for me. As the appointed Chaplain of my lodge, I will be required to do ritual work at the funeral ceremony. I am hoping to find the strength for my uncle, my lodge, my family, and myself to fulfill this obligation. My uncle enjoyed Masonry and wished he could have been more involved. I know he was proud to hear of my raising and appointment as Lodge Chaplain. If only in death, I hope to honor our brotherhood as Masons at his funeral, so he can see me one last time in full tuxedo, apron, and jewel of my profession.
To all those, who sent prayers and gave their well wishes to my uncle, I thank you. Only one person knows how long we have in this life. We just need to make the most out of that short time we’re given.
Two other quick thoughts. My father is going in to the hospital Tuesday for his 3rd catherization and stent-placement in the past month. Hopefully, third time is a charm and his cardiologist will finally provide him with some much-needed relief. Also, I want to congratulate my brother on being nominated and winning the David AG award at Wash U. It is a prestigious award only given out to 10 recipients of the hospital each year. It is a great honor and I couldn’t be more proud.
Best Wishes to all on Halloween. This message is not meant to be scary, just honest.
~Cheers
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