Overdue

It has been over 5 months since I utilized the power of the pen (or in this case the keyboard). I apologize for the absence. Many days have passed and many events have transpired. I will attempt to bring you up to speed.

October 2013
We last left the limp crusader (me) he was preparing for total left knee replacement surgery and an industrial strength hip injection to subdue pain. Doc anticipated the need to cut away several inches of corroded bone and insert steel rods to hold the artificial knee in position. Alas, he was able to replace my old knee without the assistance of extra rods. The bones above and below the knee joint weren’t corroded to the point of uselessness. Coupled with the hip injection prior to surgery, the whole procedure was a success.

Throughout the next few months, a team of in-home and outpatient physical therapists put my body through a rigorous regimen of exercises. We did everything from simple stretches, walking down a hallway, and low grade stationary bike, to weights, squads, and unassisted stair climbing. Happy to report my total left knee replacement went better than expected.

Of course with every victory also comes defeat. The physical therapy took quite a toll on my whole body, but most severely the right knee and hip. As I’ve mentioned in prior post, the day would come when both would need replacing and the day has come.
I visited Dr. John Ready of Brigham & Women’s hospital on Thursday, January 30, 2014 for a post-operative appointment. We did X-rays on the left knee and right hip. The knee looks perfect. The right hip showed increased damage to the already fractured femoral head. Instead of scheduling surgery, I opted for another hip injection (noting the success of prior injections). Unfortunately, the injection on February 3rd offered no relief. This past Friday morning I contacted Dr. Ready’s office to schedule a total right hip replacement and possible orthoscopic right knee operation. Knowing their timetable, the surgery won’t be scheduled until late May or early June. That’s 3-4 months of limping, using a cane, and biting a bullet.

On a related medical note, I recently filed an appeal against Social Security. They stated I am medically improved and no longer need their benefits. I should go back to a 40 hour a week schedule. This will cut off my disability check and medical insurance. They are under the guise of a 35-year old male in remission for 5 years is healthy enough to reenter the workplace. They don’t take into account my diagnosis of Avascular Necrosis (AVN) due to a prolonged use of steroids to combat Graph versus Host Disease (GVHD) as a result of a stem cell transplant to save my life from Mantle Cell Lymphoma.

One disease spawned a second disease in turn spawned a third diagnosis in turn has rendered the 4 major joints in my lower extremities to need repair. This causes hourly pain, limited mobility, fatigue, insomnia, and mental stress on a daily basis. The upcoming surgeries are pending on the assumption I’ll win my appeal.

Let’s see if I leave you with a positive vibe.

This summer I met a girl. She is quite the woman. She likes me for me and all my limitations. That is a rare breed. There is something special there, so I’m not rushing anything.

My son continues to grow. Most days I have nothing to give him besides companionship. Pain limits my ability to play with a spry 7-year old boy, who has energy to burn. But he tells me it’s ok and he loves me, and that I’m the best dad in the world. He tells me these things not because I supply him with vacations and expensive toys, but with my time and affection.

Time…time is all we have in the world. My time is spent mostly on a couch, in my bed, or in doctors’ offices. Most days I have just enough spoons to shower and feed myself. I try to make the best of what time I do spend with friends, family, strangers, and my loved ones. I know there are times I’m a bear and impossible to deal with, but isn’t that just human nature. Isn’t everyone entitled to a bad day, week, or year?

The next time we chat, I should be scheduled for more surgery. With each artificial piece they use to rebuild my body, I take another step forward in rebuilding my life. The sky is often filled with clouds. You just need to find your silver lining.

Cheers!